I had managed to get through most of the day without thinking of Paris Hilton , when I noticed a new convertible in front of me-occupied by two twenty-something-streaked hair-lovelies. A sticker on the right side said : "Follow me to Hooters". A sticker on the left said : "Wenches have more fun".
This was deeply troubling.
I found myself wondering if Paris Hilton was having fun - locked away as she was in a jail cell, at the order of a cruel,unfeeling judge.
I also wondered how many hits this blog would get if I mentioned Paris Hilton enough times.
( Paris Hilton - PARIS Hilton- Paris HILTON- PARIS HILTON)
Alas, poor Paris Hilton !
Did you know Ms Hilton - who became an overnight media sensation after performing a series of "instructive copulatory exercises" before live cameras (just to illustrate wenches DO have more fun)-was initially released from jail by the Sheriff, because- among other things-she was reluctant to use the toilet in her cell ? (It seems she feared someone would take her picture with one of those accursed cell phone cameras .)
Speaking of cell phones, Paris Hilton might have one right there in jail. Inmates don't generally get to have cell phones. (Jails have all these Neo-Fascist rules !) Nonetheless, Paris managed to call Barbara Walters and let her know she had learned her lesson, that she was being brave ,and that her jailers had no fashion sense whatsoever ! (Okay, maybe she didn't exactly say that...)
The traffic light ahead turned red, and, as I pulled to a stop behind the two lovelies in the convertible,I noticed some vandal had defaced their "Wenches have more fun" sticker : painstakingly scraping off the "N" in "Wenches".
Who would do such a thing? and Why ?
Was it the work of some ardent Feminist ? A brave defense of Family Values ? A demonstration for more inclusiveness in bumper stickers by a member of the Gay Community ? Mere vandalism by a jealous ex-boyfriend or girlfriend ?
I got quite intrigued with this new puzzle: so intrigued that actual minutes had passed by before I realized I wasn't thinking about Paris Hilton any more !
How many of you have experienced the trauma of not-thinking-about-Paris Hilton -very- much ?
Whoa ! That many huh ?
It's good to know I'm not alone !
ps: Paris Hilton ! Paris HILTON !! PARIS HILTON !!!